Inner Voices — Understanding Your Internal Dialogue
Work through each step, then print or save your completed exercise.
LeaderNess · Inner Voices
Understanding Your Inner Voices
Mapping the internal dialogue that shapes your decisions Based on IFS (Internal Family Systems) — Richard Schwartz
How to use this exercise
Work through the 5 steps in order. Start by naming a topic where you feel stuck or insecure. Then add all the voices you hear around that topic — give each one a name and a quote. Once your map is built, you will identify the Blockers, the Exiles, and the Boosters, and explore each one. The final diagram will show the full picture — and invite you to a deeper reflection.
What are inner voices?
According to IFS (Internal Family Systems, Richard Schwartz), our mind is not a single voice — it is a community of parts, each one trying to help us in its own way. When we face a difficult decision or feel stuck, multiple internal voices activate at the same time, often pulling in different directions. This exercise helps you name those voices, see the role each one is playing, and understand what lies beneath the conflict.
Example experience
You proudly showed a school project to your parent. Instead of celebrating it with you, they pointed out what was missing or wrong. You still remember that moment — and it left a mark.
Years later, whenever you present your work or share an idea, several voices appear at once:
"Don't show it yet, it's not good enough."
The Guard
"What if they laugh at me, just like before?"
The Fearful Child
"I just want to be seen and appreciated for my effort."
The Longing One
"Your work has real value. Share it."
The Confident Self
Each voice has a name and something to say. Once you add your own voices in the steps below, you will see them mapped in a diagram — and then discover which role each one plays.
How the diagram looks
Each voice becomes a petal in the diagram. The topic sits in the centre, and what each voice says floats outside the ring.
Step 1
Name Your Topic
Think of something where you feel really insecure, or are taking a long time to decide.
Your topic
Step 2
Add Your Voices
Name each inner voice and write what it says. Add as many as you feel — there is no limit.
Your diagram
Here are all the voices you have added, mapped around your topic.
The three roles in your inner system
Every inner voice plays one of three roles. Understanding which role each voice plays helps you see what your system is trying to do — and where the real pain is hiding.
🔴
Blockers
Parts that create fear, doubt, or paralysis to protect you from a past wound. They stop you from acting to keep you safe — even when that safety is no longer needed.
🔵
Exiles
Parts carrying pain, shame, or longing that have been pushed out of awareness. They are silenced because what they hold feels too dangerous or too vulnerable to show.
🟢
Boosters
Parts holding courage, wisdom, or warmth. They can balance the blockers and create space for the exiles to finally be heard.
Here is how those roles appear in the school project example — the same diagram, now with roles identified:
Now look at your own diagram — you will identify the same three roles in the next steps.
Step 3
Identify the Blockers
Look at your diagram. Which of these voices are trying to block or sabotage you? You can select more than one.
Your inner voice map
🔴 The Blockers — parts that create fear or doubt to protect you from a past wound
Select one or more voices that act as blockers — those that stop you, create doubt, or push you to overthink. Tap a chip to select or deselect it.
Step 4
Identify the Exiles
Which voices are not allowed to be heard? The ones silenced or pushed away. You can select more than one.
Your inner voice map
🔵 The Exiles — parts carrying pain or shame that have been pushed out of awareness
Select one or more voices that feel silenced or exiled — those not allowed to speak. If none seem exiled, imagine which one would not be allowed to be there. Tap a chip to select or deselect it.
Step 5
Identify the Boosters
Which voices can help you balance the blockers and move forward? You can select more than one.
Your inner voice map
🟢 The Boosters — parts holding courage or warmth that can balance the blockers
Select one or more voices that can help you balance the blockers — those that bring strength, calm, or clarity. Tap a chip to select or deselect it.
Your Complete Inner Voice Map
All three roles are now visible in your diagram.
Blocker
Exile
Booster
Your inner voice map — full picture
Reflection
Now that you can see all of your inner voices — the blockers protecting, the exiles longing to be heard, and the boosters ready to help — take a moment.
What do you realise after this dynamic?
LeaderNess Inner Voices Exercise · Based on IFS (Internal Family Systems) by Richard Schwartz · For personal use and reflection.
